Essential Emotional Needs & Our Inner Resources

To be human is to carry a set of fundamental needs and resources—built-in gifts given to us simply by virtue of existing. The Modified Human-Givens Model, inspired by https://www.humangivens.com/, is designed to help us understand the fundamental elements that shape our well-being. It focuses on three main components: Essential Needs, Innate Tools, and Techniques. Together, these components provide a framework for recognizing our needs, activating our inner resources, and using practical methods to create balance in our lives.

Here’s a breakdown of each part and how you can use this model to support your personal growth and well-being.


Before we continue it’s important to note that the most important claim in this model is that Human beings, like all organic beings, come into this world with a set of needs. If those needs are met appropriately, it is not possible to be mentally ill.’

Keep this in mind as we dive in!


1. Essential Needs: The Core of Well-Being

Our Essential Needs are the building blocks of our mental and emotional health. These needs include:

  • Security: Feeling safe in our environment and in our relationships.

  • Autonomy: Having the freedom to make our own choices and control our life direction.

  • Privacy: Being able to reflect and recharge away from others and heavy stimuli when needed.

  • Intimacy: Forming close, meaningful relationships with others.

  • Community: Feeling a sense of belonging and connection with a larger group.

  • Attention: Both giving and receiving attention, which validates our sense of self.

  • Competence: Knowing we are capable and effective in what we do. Skills, abilities, and knowledge.

  • Status (Respect): Receiving recognition and respect from others.

  • Purpose: Having goals and a sense of meaning that guides our actions. Vision and vocation.

When these needs are unmet, we often feel unbalanced or distressed. The first step in using this model is to reflect on these needs and identify any areas where you might feel lacking. Addressing even one unmet need can lead to significant improvements in your overall sense of well-being.


2. Innate Tools: The Resources Within Us

Our Innate Tools are the internal resources we all possess that can help us meet and fulfill our essential needs. These tools include but are not limited to:

  • Instincts: Natural inclinations that guide our behaviors.

  • Rapport: The ability to connect with others, creating a sense of trust and understanding.

  • Memory: Our capacity to recall past experiences and learn from them.

  • Intuition: Gut feelings or insights that help us make decisions.

  • Creativity: The ability to generate new ideas and solutions.

  • Language: Communicating thoughts and feelings effectively.

  • Reason: Logical thinking that allows us to analyze and understand situations.

  • Awareness: A mindful attention to our internal state and surroundings.

  • Dreams: Imaginative or subconscious insights that contribute to our mental processing.

  • Flow: A state of complete immersion in a task or activity.

  • Grit: Resilience and determination to pursue goals despite obstacles. Challenge and commitment.

  • Expression: The ability to convey thoughts and emotions through various forms.

These tools are already within us, but we may not always use them consciously. For many of us, it is a quest to uncover these inner resources. By identifying which tools we rely on and which we may neglect, we can begin to harness them more effectively to meet our needs.

For example, using empathy and rapport can enhance our relationships, while creativity can help us find new solutions to personal challenges. However, an over-reliance on rapport can lead us to neglect using expression, which can diminish our essential need for autonomy.


3. Techniques: Practical Methods for Growth

Techniques are specific practices that help us develop our innate tools and address our needs more effectively. These include:

  • Themes: Focusing on recurring patterns or themes in our life to gain insight.

  • Cycles: Recognizing and working with the various cycles and seasonality(ups and downs) of our lives.

  • Timing: Being mindful of when to act and when to pause.

  • Learning: Continuously seeking growth and knowledge.

  • Rebalancing: Adjusting priorities and focus areas to create a better sense of harmony.

  • Responsibility: Taking ownership of our actions and choices.

  • Narratives: Using storytelling or re-framing to make sense and meaning from experiences.

  • Paradoxes: Accepting that life can hold contradictory truths and finding balance within them.

  • Illumination: Bringing clarity to areas that feel confusing or light to aspects of oneself that are hidden.

  • Games/Play: Engaging in playfulness and creativity as a means of discovery and an attitude toward life.

These techniques offer ways to enhance our innate tools and meet our essential needs. For example, rebalancing helps us adjust our focus on different areas of life, while narratives allow us to process and reinterpret past experiences.

By incorporating these techniques into daily life, we can create better routines that align with our needs and support our well-being. In order to get positive change, sometimes we need to learn new insights by exploring themes and cycles. Some find benefit from reflecting on the narrative or story by which they live their life. Other times, we need to embrace life’s absurdity through paradox. In all cases, we need to accept responsibility for our existence.


How to Use the Model for Personal Growth

This model can be a helpful guide for reflecting on where you currently stand and what you need to feel more balanced and fulfilled. Here’s a simple approach to using it:

  1. Assess Your Essential Needs: Begin by identifying any essential needs that feel unmet or imbalanced. This awareness can help you understand what areas require attention and where the source of any distress may be.

  2. Activate Your Innate Tools: Once you’ve identified your needs, consider which of your innate tools can help you address them. If you’re seeking more connection to a community, for example, try using rapport and language to strengthen relationships.

  3. Apply Techniques for Growth: Choose techniques or tactics to help you hone in the effectiveness of a tool, or to help meet an essential need. These techniques, whether it’s narrative work or rebalancing, can help you develop your inner resources and meet your needs more fruitfully.

Remember, the goal isn’t to perfect every area and every part of your life but rather to create a sense of balance that feels right for you. The Modified Human-Givens Model provides a map, guiding you through your needs, resources, and practices that can enhance your life.

Using this model, you’re empowered to make adjustments, find meaning, and cultivate a life that feels whole and satisfying. Start with small steps, explore your tools, and embrace the journey of continuous growth.

Here is an image info-graphic of this model:


And a link to download this graphic for free, here:

All the best!

-ST

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The Experience of Emotions